Roses & Thorns

Sandra felt as low as the heels of her shoes when she pulled open the florist shop door, against a November gust of wind. Her life had been as sweet as a spring breeze and then, in the fourth month of her second pregnancy, a "minor" automobile accident stole her joy. This was Thanksgiving week and the time she should have delivered their infant son. She grieved over their loss.
Troubles had multiplied. Her husband's company "threatened" to transfer his job to a new location. Her sister had called to say that she could not come for her long awaited holiday visit. What's worse, Sandra's friend suggested that Sandra's grief was a God-given path to maturity that would allow her to empathize with others who suffer.

"She has no idea what I'm feeling," thought Sandra with a shudder. "Thanksgiving? Thankful for what?" she wondered. "For a careless driver whose truck was hardly scratched when he rear -ended me? For an airbag that saved my life, but took my child's?"

"Good afternoon, can I help you?" Sandra was startled by the approach of the shop clerk.
"I . . . I need an arrangement," stammered Sandra.
"For Thanksgiving? I'm convinced that flowers tell stories," she continued. "Are you looking for something that conveys 'gratitude' this Thanksgiving?"
"Not exactly!" Sandra blurted out. "In the last five months, everything that could go wrong has gone wrong."
Sandra regretted her outburst, and was surprised when the clerk said, "I have the perfect arrangement for you."

Then the bell on the door rang, and the clerk greeted the new customer."Hi, Barbara, let me get your order." She excused herself and walked back to a small workroom, then quickly reappeared, carrying an arrangement of greenery, bows, and what appeared to be long-stemmed thorny roses. Except the ends of the rose stems were neatly snipped: there were no flowers.

"Do you want these in a box?" asked the clerk. Sandra watched - was this a joke? Who would want rose stems with no flowers! She waited for laughter, but neither woman laughed. "Yes, please," Barbara replied with an appreciative smile.

"You'd think after three years of getting the special, I wouldn't be so moved by its significance, but I can feel it right here, all over again," she said, as she gently tapped her chest.

Sandra stammered, "Ah, that lady just left with .20. . uh . . . she left with no flowers!"
"That's right," said the clerk. "I cut off the flowers. That's the 'Special'. I call it the Thanksgiving Thorns Bouquet. Barbara came into the shop three years ago, feeling much as you do today," explained the clerk. "She thought she had very little to be thankful for. She had just lost her father to cancer; the family business was failing; her son had gotten into drugs; and she was facing major surgery. That same year I had lost my husband," continued the clerk. "For the first time in my life, I had to spend the holidays alone. I had no children, no husband, no family nearby, and too much debt to allow any travel."

"So what did you do?" asked Sandra.
"I learned to be thankful for thorns," answered the clerk quietly. "I've always thanked God for the good things in my life and I never questioned Him why those good things happened to me, but when the bad stuff hit, I cried out, 'Why? Why me?!' It took time for me to learn that the dark times are important to our faith! I have always enjoyed the 'flowers' of my life, but it took the thorns to show me the beauty of God's comfort! You know, the Bible says that God comforts us when we're afflicted, and from His consolation we learn to comfort others."

Sandra sucked in her breath, as she thought about what her friend had tried to tell her. "I guess the truth is I don't want comfort. I've lost a baby and I'm angry with God."

Just then someone else walked in the shop. "Hey, Phil!" the clerk greeted the balding, rotund man. "My wife sent me in to get our usual Thanksgiving arrangement . . twelve thorny, long-stemmed stems!" laughed Phil as the clerk handed him a tissue wrapped arrangement from the refrigerator.

"Those are for your wife?" asked Sandra incredulously. "Do you mind telling me why she wants a bouquet that looks like that?"

"Four years ago, my wife and I nearly divorced," Phil replied. "After forty years, we were in a real mess, but with the Lord's grace and guidance, we trudged through problem after problem, the Lord rescued our marriage. Jenny here (the clerk) told me she kept a vase of rose stems to remind her of what she had learned from "thorny" times. That was good enough for me. I took home some of those stems. My wife and I decided to label each one for a specific "problem" and give thanks for what that problem taught us." As Phil paid the clerk, he said to Sandra, "I highly recommend the Special!"

"I don't know if I can be thankful for the thorns in my life" Sandra said to the clerk. "It's all too . .. . fresh."

"Well," the clerk replied carefully, "my experience has shown me that the thorns make the roses more precious. We treasure God's providential care more during trouble than at any other time. Remember that it was a crown of thorns that Jesus wore so we might know His love. . . . Don't resent the thorns."

Tears rolled down Sandra's cheeks. For the first time since the accident, she loosened her grip on her resentment. "I'll take those twelve long-stemmed thorns, please," she managed to choke out.

"I hoped you would," said the clerk gently. "I'll have them ready in a minute."
"Thank you. What do I owe you?"
"Nothing. Nothing but a promise to allow God to heal your heart. . . The first year's arrangement is always on me." The clerk smiled and handed a card to Sandra.

"I'll attach this card to your arrangement, but maybe you would like to read it first." It read: "My God, I have never thanked You for my thorns. I have thanked You a thousand times for my roses, but never once for my thorns. Teach me the glory of the cross I bear; teach me the value of my thorns. Show me that I have climbed closer to You along the path of pain. Show me that, through my tears, the colors of Your rainbow look much more brilliant."

Praise Him for the roses; thank Him for the thorns.

Email forward. Author unknown.

Dancing With God

When I meditated on the word Guidance, I kept seeing "dance" at the end of the word.

I remember reading that doing God's will is a lot like dancing. When two people try to lead, nothing feels right. The movement doesn't flow with the music, and everything is quite uncomfortable and jerky. When one person realizes that and lets the other lead, both bodies begin to flow with the music. One gives gentle cues, perhaps with a nudge to the back or by pressing lightly in one direction or another. It's as if two become one body, moving beautifully. The dance takes surrender, willingness, and attentiveness from one person and gentle guidance and skill from the other.

My eyes drew back to the word Guidance. When I saw "G": I thought of God, followed by "u" and "I." "God, 'u' and 'I' dance." God, you, and I dance. As I lowered my head, I became willing to trust that I would get guidance about my life. Once again, I became willing to let God lead.

My prayer for you today is that God's blessings And mercies are upon you on this day and everyday. May you abide in God, as God abides in you. Dance together with God, trusting God to lead and to guide you through each season of your life.

Email forward. Author unknown.

Nest Near The Light

"Even the sparrow has found a home, and the swallow a nest for herself,

where she may have her young-- a place near your altar,

O LORD Almighty, my King and my God."

Psalm 84:3 NIV

A little birdie made its nest up in our porch light. The light is missing a pane of glass and the little bird found it to be the perfect spot for her nest. I’m a little worried because we turn on the light at night… but maybe she loves the heat! She’s a tiny thing, just a little bigger than an humming bird. Maybe a finch, or sparrow? It has a red throat. At first she was a little nervous with all the coming and going and would fly out of the nest every time some one would come in or go out the door. But now she is staying put and only leaves to eat.

Night time…. "Now this is luxury… a heated room"

Source: March 24, 2009 by Kriss Royer. Boonville, MO.

LORD PROP US UP

Every time I am asked to pray, I think of the old fellow who always prayed, "Lord, prop us up on our leanin' side." After hearing him pray that prayer many times, someone asked him why he prayed that prayer so fervently.

He answered, "Well sir, you see, it's like this... I got an old barn out back. It's been there a long time; it's withstood a lot of weather; it's gone through a lot of storms, and it's stood for many years. It's still standing. But one day I noticed it was leaning to one side a bit. So I went and got some pine poles and propped it up on its leaning side so it wouldn't fall. Then I got to thinking about that and how much I was like that old barn. I've been around a long time. I've withstood a lot of life's storms. I've withstood a lot of bad weather in life, I've withstood a lot of hard times, and I'm still standing too. But I find myself leaning to one side from time to time, so I like to ask the Lord to prop us up on our leaning side, 'cause I figure a lot of us get to leaning at times. Sometimes we get to leaning toward anger, leaning toward bitterness, leaning toward hatred, leaning toward cussing, leaning toward a lot of things that we shouldn't. So we need to pray, 'Lord, prop us up on our leaning side, so we will stand straight and tall again, to glorify the Lord.'"

If you stare at this barn for a second, you will see who will help us stand straight and tall again.

Email forward. Author unknown.

Tithe Rap

Hilarious Truth!

Lost Generation

Sometimes it takes the opposite viewpoint to convict us of the truth. But what happens when it all goes in reverse?

Rules that Girls Wish Guys Knew

1. Asking a girl on Friday for a date on Saturday is completely unacceptable. Keyword: Planning.
2. Shave every day. One day's growth of facial hair is worse than a girl not shaving her legs for a week.
3. We may be emotional beings, but do not lie to squirm your way out of trouble. We are not as gullible as you think.
4. Learn to clean up the toilet. If peeing standing up is so difficult and you are bound to miss, then may we suggest that you learn to use a toilet brush and sponge to clean up after yourself.
5. We really don't find it attractive when you stand there stratching yourself in the morning, afternoon or night- please do it in private.
6. Don't do it, if you're not going to follow-thru.
7. Don't fix it if it's really not broke. You don't need to take everything apart out of curiosity.
8. Ask for directions.
9. If you said you are going to be somewhere at a certain time, then do it. Don't expect us to wait around.
10. "I don't feel like talking right now" is an acceptable thing to say- Unacceptable thing to do is sit there and pretend you're listening and just say "uh huh" and "yes Dear"- it's condescending.
11. One remote is ENOUGH... no need to have a control tower in your living room.
12. Couch Potato is not a sport, so don't try to be an All-star at it!
13. Your way is not always the right way. Learn to say- "I was wrong."
14. If we can't talk to you during a football game, then don't try to get our attention during Ally McBeal.
15. If you say you are going to do something, then just do it. Don't sit around thinking of creative excuses why you couldn't get to it.
16. We are not your mothers, so don't expect us to clean up after you like one.
17. SkyLine Chili is not considered a romantic dinner for two.
18. If you concede to let us decorate the house without any input from you, then don't complain when everything is in frilly flowers, and pink motif.
19. We understand that you have to put on a manly act in front of your friends, but in the privacy of your own home, it's okay if you just want to cuddle.

Author Unknown.

Rules that Guys Wish Girls Knew

(A slightly different version that the Man Rules below.)

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
2. Learn to work the toilet seat; if it's up, put it down.
3. Birthdays, Valentines and anniversaries are not quests to see if we can find the perfect present once again.
4. Sometimes we're not thinking about you. Live with it.
5. If you think you're fat, you may be. Don't ask us. (besides, we're not suicidal enough to answer anything other than "no" anyway)
6. Sunday Sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. It can't be altered so just let be.
7. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as sex, shortstops and carburetors.
8. Shopping is not a sport.
9. Anything you wear is fine. Really.
10. You have enough clothes.
11. You have too many shoes.
12. Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don't work.
13. No, we don't know what day it is. We never will. Mark anniversaries on a calendar.
14. Yes, peeing standing up is more difficult than peeing from point blank range. We're bound to miss sometime.
15. Most guys own two or three pairs of shoes -- what makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?
16. Crying is blackmail. Use it if you must, but don't expect us to like it.
17. "Yes" and "No" are perfectly acceptable answers.
18. A headache that last for 17 days is a problem. See a doctor.
19. Your mom doesn't have to be our best friend.
20. The man is ALWAYS in charge of poking the campfire with a stick and/or tending the grill.
21. Don't fake it. We'd rather be ineffective than deceived.
22. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done, not both.
23. Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, neither do we.
24. Men are from earth; women are from earth. Deal with it.
25. Anything we said 6 or 8 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. All comments become null and void after 7 days.
26. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad and angry, we meant the other one.
27. We're not telepathic. We can't read your mind, so don't blame us for not knowing something you expected us to know without telling us. Conversely, you aren't telepathic either, so don't get mad about what you think we're thinking, because your guess is probably wrong.

Author Unknown.

The Man Rules

At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down. Finally, the guys' side of the story.( I must admit, it's really good.) We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side.

These are our rules! Please note...these are all numbered "1 " ON PURPOSE!

1. Men are NOT mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl.
If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down.You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really.
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball or golf or nascar.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh.

Email forward. Author unknown.

The 'Middle Wife'

"I've been teaching now for about fifteen years. I have two kids myself, but the best birth story I know is the one I saw in my own second grade classroom a few years back. When I was a kid, I loved show-and-tell. So I always have a few sessions with my students. It helps them get over shyness and usually, show-and-tell is pretty tame. Kids bring in pet turtles, model airplanes, pictures of fish they catch, stuff like that. And I never, ever place any boundaries or limitations on them. If they want to lug it in to school and talk about it, they're welcome.

Well, one day this little girl, Erica, a very bright, very outgoing kid, takes her turn and waddles up to the front of the class with a pillow stuffed under her sweater. She holds up a snapshot of an infant. 'This is Luke, my baby brother, and I'm going to tell you about his birthday.'

'First, Mom and Dad made him as a symbol of their love, and then Dad put a seed in my Mom's stomach, and Luke grew in there. He ate for nine months through an umbrella cord.' She's standing there with her hands on the pillow, and I'm trying not to laugh and wishing I had my camcorder with me. The kids are watching her in amazement.

'Then, about two Saturdays ago, my Mom starts saying and going, 'Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh!' Erica puts a hand behind her back and groans. 'She walked around the house for, like an hour, 'Oh, oh, oh!' (Now this kid is doing a hysterical duck walk and groaning.)

'My Dad called the middle wife. She delivers babies, but she doesn't have a sign on the car like the Domino's man. They got my Mom to lie down in bed like this.' (Then Erica lies down with her back against the wall.) 'And then, pop! My Mom had this bag of water she kept in there in case he got thirsty, and it just blew up and spilled all over the bed, like psshhheew!' (This kid has her legs spread with her little hands miming water flowing away. It was too much!)

'Then the middle wife starts saying 'push, push,' and 'breathe, breathe.' They started counting, but never even got past ten. Then, all of a sudden, out comes my brother. He was covered in yucky stuff that they all said it was from Mom's play-center, (placenta) so there must be a lot of toys inside there.'

Then Erica stood up, took a big theatrical bow and returned to her seat. I'm sure I applauded the loudest. Ever since then, when it's show-and-tell day, I bring my camcorder, just in case another 'Middle Wife' comes along.

Email forward. Author Unknown.